Perspective

WELL, I was going to come in here tonight to spill some of the pent up frustration of the last week's events, but the universe must be looking out for me. Instead of venting, I had the pleasure of chatting with a long-term and very dear friend whom I hadn't talked to in quite awhile. We had a few minutes of catching up, and he had me in giggles within the first five minutes. That's exactly what I needed today; a dose of perspective. What a blessing! It was good to find out he and his family are doing okay.

B's in bed early again tonight. It's been a rough week, and the fatigue has really gotten to him all week long. Seems like it's been non-stop crises every day. I'm hoping it ends soon. He was withstanding it for the first few days, but this time it's tipped him over and he's very depressed. I'm wondering how much of the long sleeping/frequent napping is fatigue, and how much is depression. Going to ask him about upping his antidepressant dosage.

He talked about going back to see his counselor for the first time since we've been together. Part of me knows that's a great idea, especially given the circumstances of the divorce. And part of me feels like I've failed him somehow. He was doing so good when we were first together. He said he felt great. And now that we've all settled into our busy, normal, bustling, two-teenager-household lives, the stress is killing him. I wish it could be different, but it won't. And he's handling them so well. He claims it's just the disease.

God, I hope that's true.

I'm a little depressed myself tonight. I'm lonely and I miss my husband. I'm off to bed.