Brand spanking new ex-step-grandma

WOW. Talk about your week filled with adventures!

On Sunday the 1st I became a grandma. Or... so to speak. The ex and I have been divorced for awhile now, and I haven't seen his son (my stepson) in a couple of years, but this weekend I got the happy news that his girlfriend and he became the proud new parents of a little baby girl. "Wow" I thought. "How exciting.... the ex is a grandpa!" I teased the ex about it, and didn't think one more thing about it until the girl and I were at Wal Mart, picking out cute little outfits in the baby section.

"Does this make me an aunt?" she asked as we stood in the checkout line.

"I think so." I said. "I don't think that just goes away."

"Ohhh." said the cashier, holding up the lacy pink little outfits. "So you're a brand new grandma, eh? I bet you're proud..."

I stood there for a beat with my mouth hanging open. SAY WHAT??? I'm a.... what?

And then it dawned on me. I guess I am. It took a beat for it to register, and then the thought right behind it: wholesale license to shop for cute little baby things. Score!!

It's a baby!

Her name is Sydni, and I think she's adorable, even if she isn't remotely related to me anymore.

And I'm not old enough to be a grandma.

So there.

:-P

In other news, the girl and I have been sharing a baffling phenomena that may have been solved. Yesterday for no apparent reason whatsoever, she fainted. It was actually a lucky thing; today she had her six month checkup with the neurologist, so we were able to run it by him right away. He noticed that her blood pressure was running on the low side, so he checked it again while she was lying down, sitting up, and then finally when she stood. He found that in each case, it got lower and lower, until when he stood her up, she was lightheaded. He explained to us that it's around a bp of 90 that the average person passes out. He said that for us little gals that have normally low blood pressure, we have a smaller margin to get to that point than the average person, so we can't afford to make any wrong moves: missing meals, eating late, not drinking enough water, standing up too long or too fast, etc. So he made us promise that we'd live the "clean life" and see if that didn't help the fainting. ;-)

This is good news, and I think maybe a source of relief to B. For several mornings now I've staggered in the shower, usually when I have my eyes closed and lean back to rinse my hair. I explained to him that it's always been that way; that I've always had balance issues, particularly with my eyes closed or early in the morning before I'm awake all the way (or when I'm in a hurry, etc., when I usually do things like run into tables or doorframes with an errant hip or shoulder because I don't have good body-awareness and don't pay attention). I'm always covered in bruises I don't remember getting.

Still, I can only imagine what runs through his mind, watching me sway or step out quickly to catch myself. I think it myself: what happens if there's something wrong with me? I promised to take care of him. I feel in a way like my being ill would somehow be dishonest to him, as if I were selling him a bad bill of goods. I know there's no logic to that, but when have feelings ever been logical? Braver this morning, I asked him if it bothered him that I was having those problems. He said it did, but not in the way I imagined. He said that anytime I was having health issues it worried him, because he valued me more than anything else in the world, and couldn't imagine life without me.

Well, I have to second that motion. We each have to promise each other to take care of ourselves, because taking care of yourself is the sincerest form of love. And how can we promise to be there for each other if we don't make sure we'll BE there? So I'm glad to find out that there's a reasonable explanation for unsteadiness: my bp has been low all my life, and I've always had postural hypotension. This, I suspect, will be the same sort of thing, and it's glad to be able to put a label on it. Because I want to be around forever, B and I.... to see our children have grandchildren.

Life is good......