Too long gone

I HAVE been too long gone from my blog, and it shows. It's been a crazy summer. I'm not even going to try to recap. We have a new house, a new son-in-law, and two new job titles. The girl is in her Senior year of HS and well on her way to college, and the boy is doing great too. The girl is currently recuperating from one foot surgery and has to have the other over Christmas break. And there's lots lots more, large and small, good and bad, but I don't have the energy to backtrack.

Actually, I haven't had a lot of energy at all lately. Not sure what the story is, but I've just been bleah. And the worst part of it is that I've been indecisive, depressed and crabby, and have made life miserable for the people I love the most in the world. Is this hormonal, or just me? Am I a malcontent? Or imbalanced? I just don't know. I just don't like it, and want to be back to me again.

We are slowly but surely making this new house a home.... OUR home. This is a place with no memories attached... no baggage. This too is blessed. But it comes with a burden. All the decisions I make here stay here. This is no rental to be painted over white and erased when we leave. The things I do here say who I am. I've been paralyzed over how to decorate (how silly does that sound in print??) for months. We finally made SOME decision (actually, I abdicated to B after three gallons of failed paint colors), and it actually looks wonderful. All except the color *I* insisted on that I painted on the trim. That has to be painted over. Cause I was wrong. Self fulfilling prophecy? Ugh.

But it is our home, and I love it.

I love this house.

I love this neighborhood.

I love what moving here has done for my children's self esteem.

I love this man, and everything he has opened the door for, for me and for my family.

Thank you, God. May I be grateful, and wake each day with a happy heart.